Is giving, the best way to happiness?
What gives you more happiness, giving something or taking something?
John has been waiting for two hours under the hot sun and David gives him a lift or; John gives a lift to David who is standing under the hot sun. Which will make John happier, giving the lift or taking the lift?
His heart says it is taking but his head says giving is the politically correct answer. There are three reasons which make the politically correct answer the right answer:
-When giving we are in control.
-Not giving doesn’t make a difference in our life when we are not aware of the need.
-Giving can bring only happiness.
To clarify the above points let us delve a little deeper and look at it from the viewpoints of John as the giver and the taker. In both the viewpoints there are three parties; two active parties and one passive party.
Defining the parties and the tripartite play
The parties are, the giver, the taker and then there is God (universe). Active party is someone who is in control and can make a voluntary decision and a passive party can only have a desire and is not in control.
The taker’s play
When John is taking the lift then who are the active parties and who is the passive party?
David and God are the active parties. From John’s point of view, David is stopping the car and the universe is playing an active role as well. John is the passive one. No matter how vigorously he waves his thumb he is not in control of the outcome.
The giver’s play
When John is giving the lift then who are the active parties and who is the passive party?
John and David are the active parties. From John’s point of view, he is choosing to stop the car and there is somebody who is actively asking for a lift but God is passive! John is in total control of his actions.
Why giving makes you happier:
1. When giving, you are in control
When John was a taker he had a requirement which had to be met. He had absolutely no control of the outcome other than expressing his requirement. When John was the giver he was in control and he chose to stop the car. A person is happy when he is in control of any situation.
2. Not giving doesn’t make a difference in our life when we are not aware of the need
When John was the taker and if David had not stopped the car, it would have made a difference in John’s life. When John was the giver and David had not asked for the lift, there would have never been a requirement. John would have moved on with his life without any difference.
3. Giving can bring only happiness
When David asks for a lift and John is the giver, the only difference that it makes in John’s life is he gets the pure joy of doing a good deed.
Give more and be happy!
When you give spontaneously, without any expectation of return or reward; you are a true giver and… you become a taker – of abundant happiness!